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You’re ALWAYS In The Driver’s Seat: 3 Keys To Unlock Your Power With Karen Abrams

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power


You have to avoid blaming others for what’s happening in your life because you’re always in the driver’s seat. It’s time to unlock your power and reclaim the life you desire and deserve. Listen to Moneeka Sawyer as she talks with Karen Abrams about unlocking your power and focusing on lightness and joy. Change is within you. What’s important is learning how to adapt, build resilience, and overcome challenges to embrace those changes. In this episode, Karen shares in-depth insights on believing in yourself while taking responsibility for the outcomes you’re experiencing. Tune in to learn more about confidence, self-worth, and shifting your beliefs.

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You’re ALWAYS In The Driver’s Seat: 3 Keys To Unlock Your Power With Karen Abrams

Real Estate Investing For Women

I am so excited to welcome to the show, Karen Abrams. Karen is a UCLA Educated Entrepreneur, Master Theta Healer, gifted intuitive, and international bestselling author. For many years, she has helped entrepreneurs and professionals with self-sabotaging habits to gain confidence, financial security, and personal fulfillment.

Karen works with clients worldwide to transform their subconscious beliefs and break free from trapped emotions, traumas, and limiting mindsets to build the financial and personal success they desire and deserve. She is known for integrating her energetic work with practical tools to bring about powerful results. Karen’s keen sense of humor, insights, and healing abilities have made her a rising star on radio, podcasts, and the international telesummit circuit in the Human Potential Movement. Karen, welcome to the show.

It’s so great to be back.

It’s so nice to see you. I met Karen in 2018 before the pandemic, and we’ve been keeping in touch. She did some sessions for me because I am a huge advocate of theta healing, and I learned it myself as a healer several years ago. I’ve been practicing my version of theta healing. I was so excited to see Karen’s focus and the way that she does it. She does it very differently than I do, which is awesome. It was healing for me because I got a completely different perspective on that. She was phenomenal. I wanted to share her with you. Karen, thanks for coming by to talk to my audience and share all your amazing wisdom.

Thank you so much. I’m so happy to be back in your happy space.

Thank you. Karen, let’s start by how did you become a healer. Give us the high-level version.

I watched a friend of mine change all of these major areas of her life with theta healing. I wanted to give you a background on her to know what was going on so you can relate to it. She’s a brilliant woman. She had a business degree from a great Ivy League school. She had big health issues that were very difficult for her to resolve. She had a long-term relationship that wasn’t going where she wanted it to go. She wasn’t making the money that she knew that she could.

She had a lot of self-sabotaging issues going on with her, like getting in fights with clients and her boss and all these things. Her friends were making $400,000 a year, and she was a fraction of that. She wasn’t able to turn it around by herself. She started working with the founder Vianna Stibal, who’s the Founder of ThetaHealing. I saw over a relatively short period of time that all of the areas of her life started to change in a big way. Her health got so much better. Her relationship transformed into the loving friendship that it was meant to be. She then started making money.

I went, “That’s interesting,” because that was an area that I was having a challenge with. When something like this work shows up so conventionally in somebody’s life, my antennas are like going, “What is that?” Vianna came out and did a beginning theta healing class. I love the class. I loved how she worked with the toughest people in the room. They changed in minutes with tough issues they were doing and looked years younger afterward.

Take a hundred percent responsibility for your life. That's where meaningful change happens. Click To Tweet

I remember after the class I felt like I could breathe. It was a three-day class. I remember walking through my apartment doing the breaststroke like, “What is this space in front of me?” I don’t even understand it. I had anxiety for a couple of years. I’ve been working with a therapist for a few years, and we got it down from an 11 to a 3, but a 3 still meant that I woke up every day terrified and that my heart was beating out of my chest every day. Nobody knew because I was like, “How’s it going?” I’ve got a great smile. I was like, “This is cool,” but what was happening was something very different on the inside.

I realized in that moment of appreciating all that space that my anxiety was gone. It was the first time in a couple of years that my body was out of fight or flight. It blew me away. I flipped out. I signed up for every single class I could take. I didn’t even know how to describe what I had been through and what it was. I knew I had to do it. I had to do it for myself, my family, and my friends. That’s as far as I got.

A few weeks after this, some of the symptoms started coming back. For anxiety, it’s a little bit, but by then, I was already in class and taking classes. I shifted away. You know when something in your life is an issue, and it’s up to here, and that slowly comes down until you stop noticing that it’s there and you go on with your life. That’s what happened. I can’t tell you the day that left, but I can tell you it did. I doubled my income. My relationships got better.

I believe that this changed the foundation of my life. I’m in a very happy marriage. We’ve been together for many years. We have a wonderful kid. We have a tight close relationship. Financially, everything’s going great. It worked out. There’s always growth to be made and things we need to do. I can’t say I’ve reached Nirvana, and I’m on the hilltop looking down, but I can say that life is amazing, and I have this tool with me all the time, and anytime I need it. I thank God for that.

I love that story. I love how you talk about, “It’s great, but there’s always room for more.” I was at a mastermind, and she said, “For us, there’s the yumminess of more.” You can be so excited, happy, and delighted with where you are, but there is this yumminess of more. What’s that next evolution? What’s that next level of joy or that next level of intimacy in our relationships? I also love how you were talking about yourself and how it started above your head. You bring your head down, and it starts up above your head, the stress levels, and then you bring it down until it disappears from your heart.

In a lot of theta healing, and I had this with many of my clients in the early days, they wouldn’t even remember what they had come to me for. You would do this session, and they would be like, “I feel great.” You have to remind them at the end of the session, “This is what you came for. You said you were at a 7, 8, 10, or 12 of 10.” They’re like, “What? That’s not even an issue.” You then try to talk to them next time, and they don’t even remember. For you, it was a process, and you remember the process. With Theta, sometimes it disappears, and it maybe not even a part of your memory base. If you remember it, it’s like it happened to somebody else.

I had that same experience myself. People would say, “Moneeka, do you remember when?” I’m like, “I don’t remember that pain, trauma, and all those things,” which is interesting. I don’t know if you do this, Karen, but I got into this habit of having people write it down. You don’t want them affirming bad things, but I would like them to write it down in their own handwriting what they were trying to fix, so I get to hand it to them and say, “This is what happened. Tell me what you notice in your life around that.” I don’t want to say magical because that takes it out of the realm of science, but it does feel in many cases.

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power

Unlock Your Power: A simple meditation allows you to connect to your inner wisdom source and also connect to your subconscious mind. When you make that connection, you’re able to access your bottom beliefs and change on the ones that really are messing with you and your life.


I agree. I remember I had a friend when I was taking all the classes. When we were towards the end of all of our education, she was like, “When I first met you, you didn’t even notice me,” I was, “That’s so weird. I don’t even understand that.” She’s like, “I remember we were eating together, and you were in your own world.”

Isn’t it funny? I understand. Tell us what theta healing is. Why don’t you describe it from your perspective?

It took me years to figure out how to do that. I don’t know if it did for you too.

It’s the thing with brainwaves.

When Vianna would describe it, I was so high in theta. I was like, “What did you say? I don’t understand.” What theta healing is a simple meditation that allows you to connect to your inner wisdom, source, whatever that name is for you, and also connect to your subconscious mind. When you make that connection, you’re able to access your bottom beliefs and change them, the ones that are messing with you and your life.

That is, “I’m nothing. I’m worthless. I’m unlovable. Nothing ever turns out for me.” With your permission, you can energetically shift these beliefs. Since we’re in the subconscious mind, we have access to all of these trapped emotions. There are things we’ve inherited, like trauma, anger, and betrayal. There are things that we went through of the same name, like sadness, grief, and all these things that have been there forever or for too long. When you’re in that theta state, your mind can talk to your body and help you release it. What gets replaced is unconditional love, understanding, and compassion.

What happens is when you take your most damaging beliefs and change them into your most powerful and positive ones, and when you replace these old toxic emotions with your most supportive ones, you start feeling better and lighter. You start making decisions in support of yourself. The dynamics in your relationships change in a loving way in your favor.

We have to practice self-care. We have to create that time where we're at the top of the list, because it's easiest for us to break promises to ourselves. Click To Tweet

The cool thing at the end of all of that, which was cool enough already, is that those barriers to following the great advice that you’ve heard and to take the actions that you’ve needed to do to move your life forward will come down. You start moving forward with more ease and focus, like a new lightness and joy. That’s what I have noticed.

The way that I used to describe it is very technical. I was scientific. There are four different brainwaves, but theta is the deepest brainwave we have access to. It happens naturally in sleep, which is why we talk so much about it, where you get messages from the universe and your subconscious when you’re sleeping. I believe it’s the place we are in, REM. Is that true? Do I remember correctly?

It’s right when we’re accessing our dream state. It’s at that point when we’re starting to space out, and we don’t know where we are. We’re on the fence between two worlds.

That’s the dream state, so you’re already asleep. You’re already gone way past alpha which is the normal meditation state that we do. You’re about to go into REM. You’re already deeply asleep and about to go into this dream state. You’re wide open for the messages, but you’re not getting the messages, or your subconscious is getting the messages, or they’re working through those messages that you’ve delivered to it.

It’s this interesting place. I’ve done some interesting things. What happens when you’re in this place is your vibration rises, and you’re sending your vibration out into the world. Readers, I hope this isn’t too woo-woo for you, but this is how it works. You know that I’m all about bliss. You know that your vibration impacts what happens to you, what you’re delivering out into the world energetically, and how you receive and perceive things. That’s why we talk so much about bliss.

You can use theta to create that energetic field. It’s like a radio, where you’re receiving and delivering. You can deliver out into the world and have this impact. I would have these things that would happen. I would have a tenant in one of my houses that was having problems. I remember once I got a call from a tenant that said, “Moneeka, I have lost my job. I’m not going to be able to pay for three months.” I said, “That’s fine.” He’s been with me for a couple of years. “I’m not going to put pressure on you, but let’s see what we can do about this. I am very happy to continue to have you be my tenant.” He was not able to make it one month, but he made up for that.

What I had done is I did my own theta process on his healing around money. I did it remotely as a surrogate for him because he wasn’t open to it. He got a new job. The next time I saw him, he was uplifted. We can’t heal other people. I’m not trying to say that, but I was healing that business process or that business exchange of money.

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power

Unlock Your Power: When you take your most damaging beliefs and you change them into your most powerful and positive ones, and replace these old toxic emotions with your most supportive ones, you’ll start feeling better and lighter and you start making decisions in support of yourself.


I’ve done this many times when I want to find the perfect tenant. I ended up with a house empty on December 1st. That’s the worst time to find a new tenant. I did a theta process and had a tenant within two days. It’s so interesting that we can use this not just in our relationships, our money, and our beliefs, but it’s the energy we send out into the world and the expectation that we magnetize back to us. It is a phenomenal tool on so many levels. Does that resonate with what you’ve experienced, too?

Absolutely. I remember I had a business mentor who said, ‘”Business is one of the most powerful vehicles for self-improvement because whatever we do or don’t do, it comes back to us.” The other description of theta is it’s like focused prayer. We’re connecting to that energy that makes everything happen and putting something positive into the mix. When we were talking about a cycle, what you feel inside you emanates out, and then the universe reflects that back. When you go into worry, which is this focus on a bad outcome. “What if this happens?” If you went into that space, it’s like, “He’ll never be able to pay. This guy that I love, I have to kick out.”

We all have a reaction. That’s okay. We got to come back from that afterward and go, “What is this triggering?” Get to the deepest part of that. Maybe there was an original wound, something going on, or something about being disappointing because you’re a people pleaser. You get to the bottom of that, and it opens up that space also for somebody else to move freely.

Everybody’s got a role in the family like, “Here’s the black sheep. This is the one who never makes it and can’t rub two nickels together.” Every time you look or think of them, you have this low vibrational signal you send out, like, “It’s okay to stay this way. This is how I expect you to be.” When you open that up and get yourself out of the mix, it frees them up to do what they need to do.

They do their own path. The thing is, we don’t want to be infringing on someone else’s path. Everybody’s here for their own learning, growing, or whatever it is that they’re supposed to be doing. As long as we deliver angst, worry, or expectation, we’re delivering our interference into their path. I understand what you’re saying about that. The result that you get is not always what you expect.

Have Faith

The universe works in interesting ways. It’s not always exactly what you expect. The next step to that is having faith that it’s happening as it’s supposed to. It’s not necessarily how I expected, but as it’s supposed to be. That’s helped me to go through that theta process, too, when it didn’t happen instantaneously, but to know that, “This was the first step. Now, here’s the next step.” It’s like that.

Let’s say he didn’t get a job immediately, but something else happened so that you could go, “I found a grant for him.” You don’t know how it’s going to show up. Even at first, it looks like contrast and something that appears negative. It’s like, “Maybe the solution to that thing is the thing that’s going to get all of this done.”

Having “me” time is very important. You need to have something that keeps you grounded and center that takes you away from your day-to-day business. Click To Tweet

Everyone you bring here, I’ll take a good educated guess that they’ve had some major thing happen to them that caused them to do the amazing work they were doing. In the beginning, it was the worst thing ever or somewhere around there, but they made it the best thing ever. Was it really that? We don’t know what we’re looking at. When we judge it in one way, we’re holding it in a space too tight of a box, and we got to open that up.

We can talk about this forever. Let’s talk about the driver’s seat. You talk a lot about you can be in the driver’s seat of your life always. What do you mean by that?

We’re always in the driver’s seat, even if we feel like we’re in the passenger seat, because it’s your life. You’re living the consequences of your life all the time, whether you’ve got a bossy partner who makes all the decisions for you or you make them yourself. This is about you. I want to give you an example. There’s an amazing statistic out there that you probably know that women lose up to $1.5 million in lifetime earnings because they’re afraid to ask for a raise. When they ask for a raise, they typically ask for 30% less than men.

We live with those results. We live with that vacuum. If we don’t fill it, we have this income vacuum that won’t take care of us when we’re older, yet if we decide and know that we’re in the driver’s seat, we can change that around and fill that space with something that’s going to support us when we need it. When I think of real estate, is there any business that has more of that in it? The decisions you make, don’t make, and the actions you take and don’t take turn up in a property, no property, worst property, or in the best. As you said, the best tenant is a nightmare. All of those things are always going on. We have to know that in order for us to come from a different and more powerful place to create what we want to create.

That was so powerful. I want the readers to sink into that. You are in the driver’s seat. You may feel like you’re in the passenger seat. I’m going to repeat this because you said it so well. You may have a bossy partner that you think is in the driver’s seat, but you are driving the car, and that is your life. You picked that partner. In your car, that person is the backseat driver. They’re in the passenger seat in your life. Not your life together, whatever that looks like, but your life.

I released a panel where I talked about conscious leadership and how we’re all leaders. It’s that same thing. We’re all leaders in this thing that we’re calling our life. We’re making our own decisions, even if that decision is to turn over all of our power to somebody else. That’s a decision we make, and that is you being the leader in your own life. That is you being the driver in your own car.

“I’ve decided that I don’t want that responsibility. I’m going to turn it over to somebody else.” Maybe we haven’t made that consciously. That’s maybe how we’ve been trained to live in the world, but you are still making that choice. We always have a choice. We’re always a driver in our own world. As I said in that panel, we’re always the leader of our own life, which can show up in many different ways. Talk to me about being in the driver’s seat in a more meaningful way, rather than, “You just are.”

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power

Unlock Your Power: When you lose faith in yourself, it’s going to reflect back out in the outer world and show you in a dissatisfying deal and unsatisfying client, whatever that is.


Make Yourself A Priority

Here’s the way you can do this in meaningful and empowering ways. The first thing you need to do is take 100% responsibility for your life. That’s where meaningful change happens. If we don’t do that and you’re always like, “No, it’s not,” you can’t be the victim here. You’re the one who’s painting the picture, so that’s first. The second thing you have to do is you have to create me time. There has to be a place in your life where you’re at the top of the list. “I am a wife and a mother of a teenager. I am a daughter of an elderly parent with health issues.” I know when I’m 4th or 5th on the list. That has to happen sometimes, but we have to create that time where we’re at the top of the list because it’s easiest for us to break promises to ourselves.

I don’t want to break a promise to my kid because she looks at me and goes, “You promised.” I don’t want to do that to my partner. I don’t want to do that to other people and see that look, but I can’t see the look on my face, but it happens. What happens is if I become disappointed in myself and break promises, I lose faith in myself and my ability to carry out my promises, which breeds dissatisfaction. This brings us back to what we were talking about before, which is if that’s what’s going on inside, it’s going to reflect back out in the outer world and show you a dissatisfying deal and unsatisfying client, whatever that is. We want to have that me time. That’s very important.

You need to have something that keeps you grounded and centered that takes you away from your day-to-day business, “I’m doing emails. I’m doing calls. I’m with clients.” You have to have something that’s completely away from that. Meditation is very important to me. That helps you stay grounded and centered in the face of chaos if that happens. Since we had COVID, we know that can happen. When things are great, and the skies are blue, it helps you soar. You can be happy for no reason. What’s better than that?

You talked about 100% responsibility. I want to go back to that. I talk a lot about me time on this show. As a women’s show and as women, we are the masters of taking care of everybody else and letting ourselves down. Building that faith in our own selves and keeping our promises to ourselves is as important. The thing is to make promises that you can keep. You’re going to make a promise to your child that you’re going to keep. You’re going to make a promise to your partner that you know you can keep.

When you make promises to yourself, make sure you’re making promises you know you can keep. In other words, don’t say, “I’ve got no me-time for myself in three years. Now, every day, I’m going to have two hours for a bubble bath.” You’re never going to be able to live up to that. It’s like, “I can do a five-minute meditation now because I haven’t done anything for myself for so long. I’m trying to build those muscles,” but you need to make commitments to yourself that you can keep and then keep them because you need to learn how to trust yourself.

This is important in business, too, because when you’re out there and don’t trust yourself, how are you going to make your own decisions? You’re going to doubt everything that you do. You’re going to doubt your promises to others, your ability to make decisions, and your ability to deal with the consequences of those decisions. That’s the biggest fear of all. It’s, “I’m going to get this property. What if it turns out to be this nightmare, and I can’t deal with it?” If you trust yourself, you can deal with it. You want to build that trust. This piece of 100% responsibility is hard. Would you say that you found that this is the hardest piece?

Yes. People tend to identify with being a victim.

Meditation is very important and that helps you stay grounded and centered in the face of chaos if that happens. Click To Tweet

Blame is the ultimate self-victimization. “The economy is bad. We’re in inflation. I can’t buy a house. Look at interest rates have gone up. I hate the president. This country is going to hell,” whatever it is, I don’t believe those things. I’m saying that this is what I hear. There’s so much out there that can victimize us that we have no control over.

We can vote. Some of us get politically involved, but we feel victimized by that. That’s the macro level, but then in our own lives, it’s like, “My husband’s bossy. My children are needy. My dog always is at the hospital.” There are all these problems, “I don’t have control.” That is self-victimization. You don’t necessarily have control, but what you do have control over is how you choose to respond. That choice to respond is what you have to take 100% responsibility for.

When you make a choice, and then there’s an outcome, you can be victimized by, “I made that choice. It didn’t work out.” Make the decision or the choice that you see this outcome, “That wasn’t awesome. What other choice can I make that will bring a better outcome?” We feel victimized by what’s going on out there. We can if we choose to, or we can choose to respond in ways that support our own bliss and joy in our own lives.

I agree with that. One of the things that I talk about in a session, and I’m sure you know this too, is the difference between responsibility and blame. Blame is a judgment, and it puts you in a corner. You have to get out of the blame. “I can’t get out of that corner because I’m bad. I did a dumb thing. How could I be so blockheaded? I keep pelting myself in that corner.”

You have to get out and heal that. All responsibility is, “Yes, I’m here. I did this. Every decision I’ve made got me here. If I’m that powerful, I can go anywhere. I just ended up here, but I can go somewhere else.” It’s a little directional change. I always talk about it like if you had a cannon pointed at one village and put it 3 degrees West, it would eventually hit a whole other place. That’s what we do. We make these minor changes that down the road will become huge, and we’ll end up in a whole different wonderful place because of it.

They’re little course corrections.

We do them. It’s life.

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power

Unlock Your Power: If you don’t have a really great self-worth of your self-sabotaging, that’s what’s going to show up in properties. You’re not going to get the properties you want, but if you do that inner work to clear yourself up and be in that blissful, joyful space, then you’re going to create that on the outside world.


It’s the way that it is. I took a class on flying a helicopter. It was so hard. Part of it is because those propellers don’t have wings, so you’re in constant course correction. You can’t even hold it straight because it will go the wrong way. In our lives, that’s a fairly dramatic view, but it is true. I say this in my book, Choose Bliss. We’re constantly course-correcting. From the moment we wake up in the morning, we decide what time we’re getting up, whether we’re going to push the snooze button, what we’re going to do with that time when we get out of bed, which side we’re going to get out of the bed, “Are we going to push these sheets back? Am I going to pet the dog? Am I going to run to the restroom?”

In five minutes of the alarm going off, it’s all these choices that we’ve made. Most of them are not conscious choices, but I’m saying that we are constantly on course correct. Each one of those choices could have been different. I could have chosen not to snooze the alarm. I could have chosen I wanted to drink some water first instead of running to the restroom. There are a lot of choices that I could make, even in the first minutes of our day, that will course correct and set me up for success.

It’s a thing that we, as humans, are constantly doing. It’s something we do anyways. Why not see it as your responsibility and keep that course correct in a way that’s going to support you as best as you can? You see the consequences and the results. If they’re not what you like, you course-correct some more. You do something a little bit differently. Tell me some examples of some of your clients that have stepped into this power of full responsibility, being in the driver’s seat, and those things.

I’ll talk first with a client I have worked with a lot. She has a tutoring business. I worked with her for a long time. She was towards the beginning of her business. Her gift was to teach young children. She could speak their language and loved them, but she didn’t have a formal education. It created this insecurity because she was going into the educational business. At that space, the parents are college educated or higher, and all of this stuff, and she’s coming into these environments. She also had very serious health issues that affected her memory, concentration, focus, and energy, which could happen at any moment. She had to be taking care of herself constantly.

As we said, business is a motivation for self-improvement. “What’s happening this week? What’s going on with you?” It was the insecurity that was playing. We would work on what are the root causes of all of that right at this moment. She could learn from it, let it go, and be like, “Cool.” She could work with her clients better. If she had a health issue, it’s the same thing, “What does it remind you of? What’s the root issue?” We would do the same thing, find the root issues, heal them, and move on. She went from an upper 5-figure business to a 6-figure business to a 7-figure business. She is looking to create this as an 8-figure business, and I have no doubt that she will get there. You can see the evolution. It was cool.

We’ve got another one who is in a relationship. This couple was in that tough spot. We all have those years where they’re hard or something. They kept disappointing, angering, and triggering each other to the point where they fought all the time. They had a kid, so the kid is in the middle of this and is not having a great time here.

I saw them separately. It was like, “What is your partner triggering in you? What’s the wound your partner’s triggering you? Is it by saying, ‘Pass the salt,’ or, ‘You didn’t get that done?'” We found all of those root causes and healed them, which gave them each more compassion for themselves. They were no longer triggered by what the other person was saying because they were coming from a different place, and they got it. It saved their marriage. They turned into this tight little happy family unit. They’re thriving even now. It’s wonderful.

Your net worth only goes as high as your self-worth. Click To Tweet

I have one in real estate one that I wanted to share with you too. I was working with a guy in commercial real estate who had some issues with his dad. We all have an issue with a parent somewhere. We got to the root of that thing. We’re able to heal it. He was able to forgive and have this beautiful outcome with him. Right after that, he had this $10,000 deal fall in his lap that came out of nowhere in real estate. He was like, “Okay.” It opened up a space that he didn’t know was filled with this anger, resentment, and withholding of love. Those are some of the amazing things that have happened when you can open up and receive this stuff.

I love the relationship thing that can help with partners, business partners, negotiation, and all of that stuff. It’s amazing. First of all, readers, have you loved this? I love theta, and I love Karen. I hope you’ve loved it too. In EXTRA, we’re going to be doing a sample session, and the focus is going to be being money worthy. I’m looking forward to that. That will be fun. How can people get in touch with you?

It’s pretty easy. You can go to my website, which is ThinkTheta.com. Contact me from there. I have my phone number and my email there, which is [email protected], so it’s easy for you to reach me.

She also has a free gift which is at BlissfulInvestor.com/Theta. Can you tell us a little bit about what the gift is?

This is a theta meditation that I call Enough Already. This is about letting you know what it feels like to have all of your needs met. When you come to the table with all of your needs met, you have the discernment to know what’s in front of you. “Is this a good deal? Is this a bad deal?” You’re not coming from that vacuum of fear, worry, or insecurity. You’re coming from this place of being completely sated and going, “That sounds great. That’s good. I’m going to pass on that.”

The more you fill yourself up with everything you need and the feeling of it, the more you will create it in the outside world. It’s wonderful. I also suggest very wholeheartedly that you do this right before you go to bed because whatever you end your evening with, it’s going to marinate in your subconscious mind for another eight hours. You might as well get the most bang for your free buck here.

I love that. You can go to BlissfulInvestor.com/Theta. You can take a look at that, but thank you so much for that gift.

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your Power

Unlock Your Power: Life happens for you, not to you. That’s going to help you react in ways that are really constructive and help you move into that space of creating the outcomes that you really desire.


You are so welcome.

Are you ready for our three rapid-fire questions?

I am.

Give us one super tip on getting started investing in real estate.

Regain Self-Worth

You got to remember this. Your net worth only goes as high as your self-worth. As we’ve been talking about before, if you don’t have great self-worth and if you’re self-sabotaging, that’s what’s going to show up. You’re not going to get the properties you want, but if you do that inner work to clear yourself up and be in that blissful and joyful space, then you’re going to create that in the outside world. It’s going to come to you.

What is one strategy for being successful as a real estate investor?

That is about getting comfortable with change. As we learned from COVID, we need to be able to pivot. We might not have to pivot all the way around, but enough to make that happen. Change is always with us. We saw a global version of it. We’ll never know if that could happen again, but knowing that you’re comfortable with it is going to build your resilience. If it builds your resilience, it’s also going to be this place that’s fodder for more creativity. Creativity is the mother of invention. It’s great.

It also gives you confidence that you can handle anything like what we were talking about. What is one daily practice that you do that contributes to your personal success?

I’m going to give you two because I already gave you the one that’s the biggie, which is meditation. Meditation saves me. When COVID hit and everything shut down, it’s the thing that saved me from staying calm and go, “What needs to get done?” This is the new little thing I wanted to give you. We also need little energetic practices. I always say metaphorically, “Stub our toe,” and we go, “Ouch,” and it starts to ruin our day. We need to be able to shift back into that positive energy.

Get comfortable with change. We need to be able to pivot. Click To Tweet

Here’s one easy thing that you can do anytime that happens to you. Let’s say something bad happens right at the moment, and you don’t get this client, or a deal falls through. At that moment, close your eyes and say, “Thank you,” and then ask the question, “How does it get any better than this?” What happens is when you go into the thank you, you’re going into gratitude. That’s the receiving mode. When you are grateful, you can’t be mad because you’re grateful. Even when it happens, it’s getting you out of anger or those things. You just keep saying it.

That, “How does it get any better than this,” is training your brain at that moment. Instead of saying, “What could be worse?” which is a lot of places we go to and get pessimistic quickly, you’re focusing on what’s going to be the better thing that happens next. That’s going to bring about a better outcome and bring about your actions, which will manifest a better outcome. It’s an easy thing you can have in your pocket at any time. It’s great. I use it all the time.

That’s so interesting. I love that. I’m going to try that. This has been so amazing. Karen, do you have parting words for my readers?

One of the most important things to remember is an old saying, but it’s a good one, “Life happens for you, not to you.” That’s going to help you react in ways that are constructive and help you move into that space of creating the outcomes that you desire. As I was saying, we don’t know if this event changed our whole life and, on that day, which might’ve been the worst day of our life, turned into the best thing that ever happened to us. When you remember that in the moment of something going on, it could change the way you react to it. What you were saying, and as a mentor of mine said, “How you react will determine your existence.”

There are so many tweetable quotes in this show. Thank you so much, Karen. That was so valuable. Readers, stay tuned. We’ve got more in EXTRA. We’re going to be doing a sample theta on being money worthy, which I love. If you are subscribed to EXTRA, stay tuned. If you are not, go to RealEstateInvestingForWomenEXTRA.com, and you can get this there for free for the first few days. After that, you can subscribe if you feel like it’s valuable content.

For those of you that are leaving us, thank you so much for joining Karen and me for this portion of the show. You know how much I appreciate you. I look forward to seeing you next time and until then, remember goals without action are just dreams. Get out there, take action, and create the life your heart deeply desires. I’ll see you next episode.


Important Links


About Karen Abrams

REW Karen Abrams | Unlock Your PowerKaren Abrams is a UCLA educated, entrepreneur, Master Theta Healer, relationship expert, and gifted intuitive. She is also an award-winning international bestselling author. She works with professional women to transform their subconscious beliefs and self-sabotaging behaviors to create new habits, mindsets and actions that bring about personal and financial fulfillment. Graduated in psychology.

Karen has honed the skills critical to Theta Healing, and as a student of meditation, her insight and intuition allow her to identify and pinpoint root causes of long-standing issues to create new understandings, forgiveness and strong inner resources. She has worked with thousands of clients worldwide who are at a crossroads in their lives- helping them heal the underlying causes of their issues and get clarity and understanding on how to move forward from there. Karen is dedicated to helping women break free from living in survival mode so they can bring about fulfilled, healthy and balanced lives.


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Growing Your Success By Plugging Into A Community With Deborah Razo – Real Estate Women


We all want success, but what happens next when we get it? Grow it! And one sure way to grow your success is to plug yourself into a community. Moneeka Sawyer’s guest today is Deborah Razo, the Founder of WREN – the Women’s Real Estate Network. Deborah talks with Moneeka about the beauty of being in a community of women and why you need them as a support system to help you succeed. Are you interested in joining the community? Listen to this episode!

Watch the episode here


Listen to the podcast here


Growing Your Success By Plugging Into A Community With Deborah Razo

Real Estate Investing for Women

I am excited to welcome back to the show, Deborah Razo. You have met Deborah but let me read her bio so that you can be reminded of who she is and a little bit more about how she and I have grown our relationship together. She always an independent spirit. She started her first business in 1990. After owning several businesses, she realized that her path to financial freedom is through real estate investing and her personal mission to teach others who seek to grow and want to live life fully.

In 2009, she began her journey with Tony Robbins and now as a Robbin’s trainer traveling globally to provide onsite coaching to attendees. In addition to her degree from UCLA, she expanded her investing education with a series of intensive workshops. It felt like a natural transition to her shifting gears from her design firm to a booming rehab business that led to developing multifamily fourplexes. She is currently focusing her energy on partnering with investors seeking financial freedom through the acquisition of real estate assets. She’s also passionate about helping other women find success in real estate investing through networking and education.

To this end, she founded the Women’s Real Estate Network, which we call WREN in 2016. WREN is what we’re going to be talking about. One of the things that I hear much from you is, “I want a community.” You’ve tried a few communities and I feel blessed because you keep coming back to me and say, “I want a community with you.” I have to say that this is a place where I fail. I’m sorry that I’m failing because I don’t love Facebook. I haven’t found a platform that allows me to be engaged and to be there for you. I feel bad about it.

I’ve been on a hunt for a way to fill that need that I’m not fully responsible for. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be responsible for you but I don’t want to be responsible for the tech. I don’t want to remain responsible for Facebook ads. There is so much stuff involved in this that I don’t have expertise in. I’m not interested in it.

What I’m interested in is chatting with you and helping you grow and being your best selves and having conversations. When we first met, she mentioned that she has WREN and it was of in its baby stages. I was excited to chat with her. We’ve stayed in touch. The community has grown. It’s on Facebook. There’s a lot of people managing that and I’m a part of that. As it’s grown, I thought, “This is a place where my ladies could go.”

Some of the things that I love about this is this not a Facebook group, it’s a paid membership. Not huge amount of dollars like penny, super cheap but because of that we have a group of ladies that are interested in talking real estate. There are no trolls and no advertising. We’re there to help one another. That’s why I’m bringing Deborah back is because I want to talk about what she’s doing and how this can help you.

As we move into a new year, I’d like you to consider what are your goals. You ladies asked for the community because you need it. As women, we are very good at building community in many areas of our life. However, building community and talking about money, investing in real estate somehow, we shy away from it. We shy away from asking questions, answering other people’s questions and hanging out. I’m not sure totally why that is but I do know that women have some ideas about money and what we should and shouldn’t be talking about. It’s not conscious, it’s deeply ingrained inside of us.

We’re not like them. We’re fine sitting around the dinner table, talking about money and mortgage rates. To us, it might seem a little bit boring but when you’re talking with another woman that’s passionate about it, it’s not boring. This year I’d like you to consider building your community because it will support you. It will help you get the education you need when things go wrong or you have issues, you have a place to go to ask questions. You don’t have to feel bad about it. There’s never a dumb question.

REW 93 | Growing Your Success

Growing Your Success: The pandemic has made us all reevaluate whether we’re living our best lives and living how we want to live.


We’re all there to support each other. You need that. All of us need that. We have that in many areas of her life, we need this in our real estate business too. As we move into this conversation, I want you to plant the seed inside of yourself that, “It’s time for me to build a community. That’s going to support my expansion.” That’s one of your goals for 2022. I’m giving it to you. Let me bring in Deborah. Welcome to the show.

I’m writing that as the top of my goal for 2022. Thank you much for having me back.

For those, that haven’t heard your story in a little while, could you give us the high-level version of how you got into real estate?

I’ve been an entrepreneur for years. I’m going to qualify that by saying I built my own job. It wasn’t that I had a system where I was building passive income. I had built my own job. I was paid money to do work for clients. Then, I was in a bad car accident. It made me think about what I wanted out of life. A lot of people are going through that now. We’ve had this pandemic and it makes you reevaluate. “Am I living my best life? Am I living what I want to live?” It’s created a space for transition for people. That’s what my accident did for me.

it created the space of transition and me asking the questions like, “What am I doing? Am I living my best me?” The answer was no. That didn’t mean I had a bad life but it wasn’t the life I wanted or dreamed of. There was a part of me that was scared to dream and to want all that. With this decision and this accident in my life, I was like, “It’s now or never. We got to grasp now.” I decided to make some changes and I wanted passive income. I started googling passive income.

There are lots of things that come up. There’s real estate, royalties and all kinds of things that come up but real estate always, pops up. That’s when I thought, “I want to get me some of that mailbox money that everybody talks about.” I transitioned and started my journey towards that. I look at some of the mentors that I follow and I haven’t been always the most focused. I tried things and love them. I’ve tried things and hated them. That’s all in the journey and all in the learning process. Along the way, I found other women who would encourage and support me, which is what we’re talking about here.

Talk to me a little bit about that. What did that look like and what happened?

I was going through a frustrating time. I didn’t have a lot of money after the accident, and then I borrowed some money to help flip a house and thinking that I’ll get the capital from flipping and then I’ll reinvest in buy and holds for the cashflow. Cashflow has always been my long-term goal. The wealth in the cashflow so that I could get out of the rat race and travel the world and all that stuff. I wanted freedom. I was flipping and a bunch of hedge funds moved into my area and they were buying up so many of the properties that I would put offers in for and try to flip.

I was super frustrated. I was like, “I can’t find anything that’s working.” Where the numbers are working, I’m being outbid all the time. I felt like, “Where are my girls?” I need my support system around me. It’s not to say that I haven’t gotten great education from men, I have. They don’t think the thing way we do. They’re not balancing the things that we’re balancing.

Having some people with whom you can bounce ideas and share resources is amazing.

I put together a brunch in downtown LA on a Sunday and I invited a bunch of women who were full-time investors. They weren’t all flippers that. There are two women that owned eighteen storage units across the US. There was a woman that was a lender. There was a woman that was into notes. They were all full-time real estate investors. It was fun. We got together and were fun but what started happening is we started talking to each other about our problems and offering help.

That is one of the things that come naturally to women. “You need a lender? I know this guy, he’s a hard money lender. Do you need a babysitter? Do you need a gardener?” We share resources. Having some people that you can bounce ideas off of and share resources with is amazing. At the end of that brunch, I said, “I was thinking about doing this quarterly.” They said, “Let’s do it every other month.”

People started opening up their homes and there was usually wine involved. What ended up happening is not only did I know, like and trust these women but we started doing business together. I would JV with one of them. Somebody would lend on my job. I would lend on somebody’s project. I would buy into something. I look at that group of women and I realized they have affected my bottom line. That’s when networking becomes productive. That is productive networking.

At some point, I realized there were all these other women out there that didn’t even know about these rockstar women because they weren’t at the front of the room. They weren’t telling their story. They weren’t sharing their business models. I thought, “Let’s start a meetup that so I can take from this group of amazing women and put them in front of the room and say, ‘There are other women that are out there doing this.’” It means something when people see somebody like them. When another woman sees a woman, that’s amazing. She goes, “She’s doing that. I can do it.” That’s what started happening and then we grew quickly then technology came into play.

I am good at face-to-face. I’ve run meet-ups. I had groups that ran for years. It’s not that I’m not technically savvy. I am but for whatever reason, there are certain pieces that I’m not awesome at. I appreciate that you took that on. It was interesting, I was talking to somebody about the show. They were like, “Why do you focus on women? What’s the difference between men and women?” I was like, “You’re not interested in talking about menopause or what it’s like to be a mom that has a brand-new baby and still wants to run a business or to be a stay-at-home mom and your husband’s the main bread breadwinner. You feel like you don’t have any right to the money to invest.

In fact, often he doesn’t trust you because he hasn’t studied it himself. Not because he doesn’t respect you or love you but because he’s managed all the money, that’s his job. You’ve managed the kid. There’s been a division of labor and you’re trying to change the paradigm. My husband is amazing. In any case, we have issues as women, that men as much as they might want to understand, it’s impossible.

He doesn’t have our hormones. He doesn’t have the way that our minds work and our feeling of responsibility to our children, fur babies or our aging parents. It’s not just that we think differently because we do but we have very real physical aspects about our life that no man can relate to. You walk into a room of a bunch of men, real estate investors, they will be very respectful and you learn a lot. I learn a lot but I’ve also been hit on a lot, which is not appropriate. We’re talking business. We deal with stuff that is different and men don’t understand.

The way we relate to each other is different. I was flipping here in Los Angeles and we opened a WREN chapter in Seattle. I was up at the WREN chapter in Seattle. There was a woman at the WREN chapter who was a developer. I walked up to her and I was like, “You’re a developer. That’s cool.” You don’t meet women developers. She goes, “You’re a flipper, right?” I said, “Yes.” She goes, “I used to be a flipper but developing is so much easier.” I was like, “What?” We had this conversation that night that opened up my paradigm. I had never seen myself as a developer because I hadn’t met women developers. The developers I had met had been men. None of them had told me, “It’s easier. You can do it.”

REW 93 | Growing Your Success

Growing Your Success: Men don’t think the way women do. Let’s face it; they’re not balancing the things that women are balancing.


You’re dealing with these men developers, most of the men that do development are either contractors themselves or have contractors in their pockets. They know each other, it’s like the all-boys network. They don’t perceive how we fit sometimes. I don’t feel like any of it is of malice or maybe sometimes. Mostly their hearts are big but they don’t understand and they can’t because they’re not women. The same way as we can’t understand what it’s like to walk in a man’s shoe. We’ve had a little bit of training because we’re out there in business with them in our society. We don’t know what it’s like to be a guy.

It’s important to be able to have communication that’s open and real. You don’t have to worry about, “Am I articulating this right so that he’ll understand?” You’ve been doing this for years. I’ve been doing this for many years. For me, when I started in this business, it was all men. There were no women mentors. I remember it was exhausting trying to figure out how to communicate right so they didn’t think I was dumb, emotional, hormonal or didn’t know the numbers. There was this impression about women and numbers and all of these things. Everybody knew I was smart. I came from UC Berkeley but there’s a different way of looking at each other.

It’s not even about being smart. It’s about being taken seriously. To finish up that story, I went on to develop. I’ve developed a couple of fourplexes. Sometimes even now I’ll say, “I’ve developed.” It’s so funny the expressions I get on men’s faces sometimes. Some of them are respectful and in awe of me and some of them are shocked. I was like, “What do you know? We do the same thing.”

Every once in a while, to be goofy because I’m feeling very much that I need stand for myself. I’ll say, “I’m the CEO of a multimillion-dollar development company.” They’ll be like, “What?” I’m like, “I developed in Los Altos.” They’re like, “What?” They stop with the, “I know much more than you.” Now, it’s much more of an equal conversation. I never feel like they mean it but it’s the way the paradigm has been in the past and we’re trying to shift that. In the meantime, we need each other.

What’s beautiful in that is that I can see you like that, you can see me like that, we can express that to other women who can look at us and go, “She’s doing that? I could do that?” Like that woman that opened up development to me. I’ll open it up for other women. That’s the beauty of being in a community of women is that we can open up our minds to different ways to do things.

Not only is it, a resource like if I have a problem, I have several smart women on my telephone that could help me with that problem. It’s also a source of encouragement like, “One of the women in WREN, she’s buying her third hotel.” It’s that source of like, “There are these women who are heartfelt but great all at the same time.”

To know that that’s possible and it’s okay. You get to have good conversations with those women. They’re not inaccessible.

They’re transparent. We all have bad days. I jokingly say, “Yes, there is crying in real estate. It’s okay we’ve all done it.” It’s not all cashflow and wine. It’s also great to have the girlfriend to go “Get it out. Sit on your pity pot. Are we done? Brush yourself off and we’re going to go again. We’re going to go at it.” One of the things that I find that’s interesting to me, I study a lot of statistics between women and men investors. Oddly enough, maybe to men, women tend to have a higher return on their investments. It’s fascinating. We don’t get in as quickly as men do.

There’s no way around. There’s just walking through.

Sometimes women miss opportunities in real estate because it is about making the offer and getting in on that deal. It’s not that we don’t know it’s a deal because there’s an internal sensor when a woman finds a deal whether it’s shoes, house or whatever it is. There’s something that goes off on us but there’s also a hesitation when the ticket price is a little higher.

There’s a hesitation when that happens. We have a saying in WREN, like “You can borrow my confidence. Make the offer.” That’s how it is. We have to lean on each other to go, “Should I?” Somebody has to stand behind you and go, “Go ahead, do it.” It’s interesting being surrounded by a community of women in that, in that sense.

I love when you were talking about the pity party because I feel like we need our time to honor our feelings and our fears. We also need a little bit of a kick in the butt that says, “You’re done now.” a lot of times what happens is us women are such good listeners. We want to be there. We want to hold space. We want to make sure that you feel heard but we don’t go to that next step because it’s scary. It’s scary to tell another woman, “Are you done yet because now it’s time for you to move forward?”

It’s a hard thing to say and hear as a woman because we want to be loved, liked, heard and I want you to know my feelings. This is me. I know I’m generalizing, if that’s not, you please forgive me but that’s who I am. I know that that’s who a lot of the women that I am around. I used to be a day trader or trading options. I had one morning where I woke up and the brokerage had screwed up the closing out of the option trade and I owed $400,000 in one night.

David and I were making $60,000 a year in California. We had no money. I got out of it. it was a brokerage’s fault. It was all recorded and all that stuff. It was fine. I ended up making $20,000 that day but which is cool but not for that stress. I think what happened was at that point, I was like, “I can’t do this. I can’t wake up in the morning and owe $400,000. I can’t do that.” I stopped trading for two months and stopped.

A girlfriend of mine, we would go for a walk every day after my trading. She says, “Are you trading yet? I’m like, “I’m not going to do it.” It’s too dangerous. It’s too risky. One day, she said to me, “You need to get back on the horse and ride. You can’t live your life in fear.” Every single time that I’m in fear or something has gone terribly wrong and I’m like, “I can’t do this.” I hear her voice.

If my husband says something to me like that, I’d be like, “You don’t understand.” That’s not nice of me. He was also scared too so he wouldn’t say, “Get back on your horse.” He’s like, “No, don’t do any more of this,” because he was emotionally and financially invested too in that situation. Having another woman tell me someone that I knew cared about me to say, “You can’t live in fear. You’re never going to succeed if you keep going like this.” I love that you’ve created this community of successful women that understand that and that we can help each other.

What’s also helpful, which we’ve touched on is that perspective. Having a mentor or somebody who has a perspective of who you are. I’ve had them too. I was in a deal. It wasn’t going well and I got scared. When you get scared, you’re not making decisions from an empowering place. You’re making decisions from a completely disempowered place. You’re not making the best decisions. You’re making decisions out of fear instead of making decisions out of thinking something through.

REW 93 | Growing Your Success

Growing Your Success: It’s not about being smart. It’s about being taken seriously.


One of my mentors is also a woman who’s been in the business like your length of time and said, “There’s no way around, there’s just through.” You can just walk through. It took my fear down. I was like, “She’s right. I’m going to put my best foot forward today and then tomorrow. I’m going to do the same thing. The day after that, I’m going to do the same thing.” We’re going to walk through. She was lending me her experience.

I couldn’t see like that I was going to get through it. I ended up getting through it and making a profit. I didn’t lose any money in the long run but I needed somebody there to encourage me that way. It’s interesting how we can encourage each other to step up, step-through and continue through our fear. I love that WREN is an opportunity for a community like that. We have women who have a lot of years of experience like me and you. We need those women coming in that are new to the business because they’re excited.

I’m always like get on my calendar and talk to me because they’re the funniest conversations. I’m coaching, I get that. To hear the excitement and the ideas that they bring, there’s so much out there that it’s impossible for me to know what’s out there, what people are seeing and also what they’re needing. It juices me so much.

They need people with experience. They need people to go, “Come on. You’re going to go this way. Okay. You’re not going to get it unless you put an offer in. Put an offer in.” It works well. We also have the framework of being women. There are some definite traits that we have that come up and that is asking for what you need. Women have a tendency not to do that. In our community, we embrace the femininity of that and ask for what we need in that way.

We all can do business in a man’s world because we’ve had to, short, direct and succinct. It’s also wonderful to embrace our femininity and do business like we want to do business, which is more creative, collaborative and win-win for everybody. It’s an interesting paradigm when you shift into a feminine space for your business, operating system, that it becomes more profitable sometimes. It’s pretty cool.

I stole the conversation around us experienced women needing beginners because I got excited about that but I want to hear your perspective.

A woman that’s been in the business for a long time, we take for granted some of the things that we know or some of the little joys that you get from being new in the business. Being able to see how to make money or a certain perspective of something. It’s encouraging to me when I meet women who are getting into this business and they’re all excited. Whether it’s providing for their kids or an at-home-mom who’s wanting to provide a good vacation for them during the summer. It’s cool that all walks of life can be in the same community.

The people that are new to the business need to see the people that have been in the business for a while. They are doing it, successful and they are making things happen and vice versa. We need their energy and their enthusiasm and their go-getterness. It’s a good symbiotic relationship. I’m glad to say that we have women at all levels of education in the community.

Networking is about forming relationships, and there is a way to network that is productive to your business.

We become a little bit complacent because we’re been there, done that. You think you know. We’re surprised when we don’t know. That’s the thing about a beginner is you’re okay with not knowing. For us, it feels a little bit like I should’ve known that. If I do something that was “stupid” although nobody does anything stupid but you might think to yourself, “That was dumb. I should’ve known better.” Things are constantly changing. Having that beginner’s mind and having that around you allow you to feel better also in those moments where you’re like, “I should have known that.”

It’s acknowledging that. One of the meetings that we have is called Power Hour and we feature women who are WREN members, who’ve maybe completed a project and they are presenting their case study. We do this for a couple of different reasons, one of them is because we don’t get the opportunity to step forward as leaders in our real estate community out in the regular world.

Most of the time, a woman is not at the front of the room but maybe once a year at a regular REIA. We want it to give a platform that we could train women to step to the front of the room, to start to feel that confidence, to foster leadership in our community and give that opportunity to them. It’s one of the things that I love best because it’s like I’m being able to contribute to somebody else’s growth.

We have a little mentoring system for that process so that they’re not going on cold turkey. They get a template and coaching so that they can learn to own themselves, their voice and their presentation and feel the reward of that. Sometimes as women, we don’t celebrate our wins enough. That’s what part of that is about too, let’s celebrate our wins. Let’s look at another member and go, “You rocked it.” It’s cool that way.

I want to talk specifically about WREN, the platform and all of your offerings. Before we move into that to get onto the platform, get the membership and get all the details. You go to BlissfulInvestor.com/WREN for Women’s Real Estate Network and then you can go to the page to where you can sign up. When they go to that website, what are they going to find? Talk to us a little bit about the offerings and what women can expect.

We have an annual membership for our networking organization and it’s $249, which is not expensive at all. The benefits are amazing. At first, you become part of our network. We send you a series of network training. We call it Work It Girl Network Training. Here’s the reason why whether you’re in front of a person or whether you’re on a Zoom call, putting your contact information in the chat is not networking. Giving your card to somebody is not networking. Networking is about forming relationships. There is a way to network that is productive to your business.

This is a series of three videos that talk about how to network so that it’s productive for your business. We want you to succeed. We want you to network that it’s productive for your bottom line. We want you to go through that training so that when you’re welcomed into the community that you understand that. We have a Facebook page that is where most of our community activity is going on.

We have all kinds of resources on our Facebook page whether you’re starting as a wholesaler and you need scripts, those are up there. Whether you’re wanting to learn to run numbers for something, those are up there. There are all kinds of resources on our Facebook page. We have monthly member-only meetings. Those members-only meetings, not only do you get to connect with other members and learn about their business models and what they’re doing and see if there’s somebody you can do business with.

REW 93 | Growing Your Success

Growing Your Success: The beauty of being in a community of women is that we can open up our minds to different ways of doing things.


If you’re a wholesaler, you need flippers to buy your deals or whatever it is. Maybe you’re a passive investor and you’re looking for investments. Sometimes at the monthly meetings, we’ll have a speaker that might’ve spoke for us and come so you can ask questions that you can get that off-camera relationship going with some of the speakers and the experts.

Those monthly meetings are online. No matter where you are, you can go to that.

WREN has been around for a little bit and we started as an in-person networking company. We have eleven chapters across the US. When the pandemic hit, we went online and we haven’t started opening up yet. Some of the ladies aren’t ready to come out. What we did was go online and it’s been interesting. It’s cool that I’m meeting women from all over the US. don’t know about you but I have flipped in Los Angeles for a while but my buy and holds are not in LA. My buy and holds are in Memphis, Tennessee, Tucson, Arizona and Houston, Texas.

I’m real estate investing in all those areas. I’m meeting women in those areas that are investors. My network is like, “I need a contractor. That’s not in my local area. That’s in your area. Can you help me? I needed an insurance person. That’s in your area. Can you help me?” The value of the network is even expanding because it’s ten feet outside of my house. It’s in that community that I’m already investing in. It’s been interesting to meet women who are all over investing. We have a couple of women who are flipping in Alaska. It’s been great that way. Online has expanded things and in a perspective of, “Where is she investing? Is that a good market? Can you tell me about it?” It’s been interesting that way.

Those are some of the benefits of being a WREN member. We have also other monthly meetings where we bring in a speaker to educate you on a certain business model. For example, we have people come in that are flippers and they talk to you about flipping. Somebody coming in about raising capital or mobile home parks.

It’s all women always at the front of the room so that we can learn from them and we can ask them any question we want, from how they execute their business model to how they’re juggling it. We had one woman come in, who’s got five kids for goodness sakes. It’s like, “How are you doing that?” She was telling us about the systems that she’s using so that she doesn’t have to be away from her kids all the time but still can run her business. That’s helpful too. It’s an interesting community.

You also have Ignite which is your event. Is it one time a year? Tell us a little bit about that.

It’s been one time a year and an in-person event. It was a three-day event, the last time that we had it. It was amazing, great energy, with 250 women coming out. Celebrating not only real estate and our speakers that took the front of the room but also starting the day in meditation. Having that opportunity to open ourselves up for what we’re ready to bring into our lives that day. There’s a feminine touch to it all and the networking at the end with wine and stuff.

Surround yourself with people that you want to be like. Hang around with people who are doing what you want to do.

We went online for the pandemic. We had an event, last November 2021 but it was a one-day event. We’re hoping to have an in-person event in 2022. That’s on our goal list. The online events have been great and we try to do it a little differently. One of the things that we’ve done online is we have a pajama networking party day. Everybody dresses up in their pajamas and we bring a cocktail and we network together. It’s fun and it’s a different way for us to be chicks together. We have plans for 2022. Hopefully opening up and having an in-person event again.

I’m part of the network also. As I said, I love having a community but I’m not over-involved online at least through 2021. 2022, I’m looking forward to also building out my network too because I’ve got some new things coming and going in my life too. Please and come join me and Deborah. It’s at BlissfulInvestor.com/WREN. You can sign up there and then we can all start hanging out like chicks.

We have EXTRA, which is the membership portion of the show. I want to do a little bit of a deeper dive on helping people understand how to network for building their businesses and specifically going online. I feel like that’s been a little bit of a challenge for me. I know that you’ve had this experience through the pandemic of how to help people or women connect when we’re online whether it’s on Facebook or it’s at one of your community calls or one of your meetups online or at Ignite. Before we move into EXTRA, are you ready for three rapid-fire questions?

Yes, I am.

Give us one super tip on getting started investing in real estate.

Surround yourself with people that you want to be like. When I started, I wanted to be a flipper so I surrounded myself with flippers. I learned their vocabulary and I saw what they were doing. I asked them to share their numbers with me. I asked them to show me some on-site projects going on. Hang around with people who are doing what you want to do.

What’s the strategy for being successful as a real estate investor?

You touched on fear and walking through your fear. Focus on what you want, focus on why you’re doing this. I had a tremendous amount of focus on the lifestyle I wanted to live. That’s what got me here and I’m living that lifestyle now. You need to continue your focus on what it is that you want because that’s what’s going to pull you through the fear.

Tell us one daily practice you do that contributes to your success.

REW 93 | Growing Your Success

Growing Your Success: We all can do business in a man’s world and be short, direct, and succinct. But it’s also wonderful to embrace our femininity and do business like we want to do business which is more creative, collaborative, and win-win for everybody.


Grateful list. It’s funny because I woke up in a funk. I reached out to one of my friends and she was like, “Have you done your grateful list?” I hadn’t done it in a few days. I realized, “That’s what was missing.” When I’m grateful about where I am and what I already have, it’s much easier for me to walk through that day and take on whatever’s brought to me.

I jokingly say that as an entrepreneur, “Nobody calls me unless there’s a problem,” It’s the truth. If things are going right, I don’t hear from anybody. It’s always when things are going wrong that I hear from people but being in a grateful place puts you in a very resourceful place. When that phone does ring, I’m in a place of like, “I’m here. Brainstorm, let’s do it. Let’s figure it out.” It’s the grateful list for me.

It’s such a good perspective on it. It does make us much more resourceful. This has been amazing. We’ve got these pieces or little nuggets that we can share that can completely shift a person’s paradigm. My audience loves the three rapid-fire questions because it’s those nuggets that they can take into their life that can change everything. This has been so much fun. Thank you much for sharing WREN with my audience.

Thank you, Moneeka. This has been great.

Stay tuned for EXTRA. We’re going to do a deep dive on how to that work, not giving your number or giving your card and how to do it online so you can take advantage of all these resources that we’ve got that have been developed because of the pandemic. There are so many good things. The whole pandemic was hard and there was a lot of yuckiness and there were also some amazing things that served our lives that have come out from that too.

This is one of those amazing things that we can learn about and utilize to build our lives and ourselves and our wealth. I’m super excited to talk about that in EXTRA. If you are subscribed to EXTRA stay tuned, if you’re not go to RealEstateInvestingForWomenExtra.com and you get the first seven days for free of the subscription so check it out and see if you love it. Hopefully, you’ll stay with us.

For those of you that are leaving Deborah and me, thank you for joining us for this conversation. I hope to see you at WREN, networking, asking questions and all of that good stuff. I also look forward to seeing you next time. Always remember goals without action are dreams. Get out there. Take action and create the life your heart deeply desires.


Important Links


About Deborah Razo

REW 93 | Growing Your SuccessAlways an independent spirit, she started her first business in 1990. After owning and partnering in several successful small businesses, she realized that her path to financial freedom was through real estate investing.

In addition to her business degree and graduate work at UCLA’s Anderson School of Management, she expanded her investing education in 2011 with a series of intensive workshops with Robert Kiyosaki, The Rich Dad Advisors and The Real Estate Radio Guys.

It was a natural transition to shift gears from my 20-year design firm to my booming rehabbing business in Southern California. With her first house flip netting near $100,000 in profits her business took off. Her strategy of flipping houses in California for capital and buying and holding for cash flow in other markets for long term wealth has proven to be a success. And just 2 years ago moved from rehab to development.


To listen to the EXTRA portion of this show go to RealEstateInvestingForWomenExtra.com

To see this program in video:

Search on Roku for Real Estate Investing 4 Women or go to this link: https://blissfulinvestor.com/biroku

On YouTube go to Real Estate Investing for Women

The Magic Of Asking With Mark Victor Hansen – Real Estate For Women

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking


When we were young, we always asked questions regarding things around us out of curiosity. The answers to those questions provide us with the knowledge we need to face the unknown. In this episode, Mark Victor Hansen talks about the magic of asking and some of the roadblocks people usually have that prevent them from doing so. Mark is best known as the co-author for the Chicken Soup for the Soul book series and brand, setting world records and book sales with over 500 million books sold. Tune in and rediscover the magic of asking. Plus, learn Mark’s technique for asking your higher self, the universe, or God how to find out what your destiny is and what you’re supposed to be doing.

Watch the episode here


Listen to the podcast here


The Magic Of Asking With Mark Victor Hansen – Real Estate For Women

Real Estate Investing for Women

I am so excited to welcome to the show Mark Victor Hansen. Mark is best known as the Coauthor for the Chicken Soup For The Soul book series and brand, setting world records and book sales with over 500 million books sold. Mark also worked his way into the worldwide spotlight as a sought-after keynote speaker and entrepreneurial marketing maven, creating a stream of successful people who have created massive success for themselves through Mark’s unique teachings and wisdom.

With his endearing charismatic style, Mark captures his audience’s attention as well as their hearts. Having spoken to over 6,000 audiences worldwide with his one-of-a-kind technique and masterful authority of his work, time and again, he continues to receive high accolades from his audiences as one of the most dynamic and compelling speakers and leaders of our time. Mark and Crystal Hansen have coauthored their newest book that was released called Ask! The Bridge From Your Dreams To Your Destiny.

Mark, Happy New Year. Welcome to the show.

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking

The Magic of Asking: What’s so extraordinary is that most people never ask themselves what they want.


It’s super exciting because it’s a new year and a new you or a new renewed you because everybody is into the transformation of consciousness, awareness, thinking, and ready to burst with joy and enthusiasm and euphoria. How’s that?

Do you know what I love about the New Year? I don’t set New Year’s resolutions. I set New Year’s intentions. I figure my New Year is on my birthday, which is May. I feel like I get two New Year’s every year and they’re about six months apart. What I love about this winter New Year is that we are planting the seeds that are going to burst in the spring in a couple of months and there’s so much anticipation. There is so much possibility at this moment. Wouldn’t you agree?

I 100% agree. It could not be more exciting. What you’re going to do is you got to ask yourself. Ask! The Bridge From Your Dreams To Your Destiny is our best-selling book, but what is your destiny? That’s the question of the new you, the new year, because as good as you are, you could be better. As big as you are, you can be bigger.

You got to know what it is you want to be, want to do, and want to have. All of that is done by one miraculous three-letter word that no one ever wrote a book to, and you get the trademark of the title ASK. How could it be easier because all I got to do is ask yourself, ask others and ask God what you want to talk about? I’m thankful that we’re going to ask, what are you going to do to make this the best year, best decade, and best life that you’ve ever had, and you’ve got to figure it out and put it in writing. I’m going to talk to you about how simple that is.

I want to say that there are many people that binge this show, so you might be reading this in September or any time of the year to understand. I know how trite this is going to sound, but I have to say it. This is the first day of the rest of your life. This conversation is relevant no matter what time of year or when you’re reading it, so keep that in mind. One of the things that I wanted Mark on the show for ladies is, as we start to build our dream and meet our destiny, as Mark is going to talk about, we start to ask ourselves, what is it that we want? We have talked a lot about that in this show.

We set our goals and we ask the universe for support. Mark, you can correct me if this is for everybody, but I’m sure that it is, especially for women. We have trouble asking the people in our network, the people who love us, around us, and the people we don’t know yet. I know that Mark and I are aligned on this. We’re going to talk about all of those three different ways to ask. The very first thing I want to ask you, Mark, is why did you write this book? You gave us a little bit, but dive in deep on why you and Crystal did this.

My beloved wife and I wrote Ask! The Bridge From Your Dream To Your Destiny is very simple. We have traveled and been more blessed than anybody did in 80 countries around the world. We talked to 7 million people live and what’s so extraordinary is most people never ask themselves what they want. I have medical doctors. We have people pair bond and do what you said. They say, “Your class was more important than all my medical school training or engineering training, or whatever.” We asked them 50 times like, “What do you want?” What happens is you get past the super system, “I want a wardrobe that’s good enough to own a men’s store or women’s store. I want to be a fashionista. I want to have this car, that car, electric car, or a Rolls Royce,” or whatever it is that you want.

By the time you hit 50 times asking, you suddenly go, “What is my personal life? What am I going to dedicate myself to humanity for?” The big question we asked, the last question in a book from our friend, Dr. Peter Diamandis is, “What are you going to do during this decade to positively affect one billion people?” You’ve got ten years. You’re going to affect one billion people.

As good as you are, you could be better. As big as you already are, you can be bigger.

What it does is it blows the lid off because what is asking does and what we learned gives illumination, insight, answers, and solutions. It gives new protocols, so your life becomes what it’s supposed to be because all of us are here with a destiny. That’s what this critical little word here destiny. Most people never ask themselves what their destiny is. Your mother said, “You’re going to be a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer or a businessperson, dentist, or a garbage person.”

All of which is noble, but that’s not the issue. The issue is all of us is a polymath. It’s not for Ben Franklin to be a writer, a statesman, an inventor of bifocals, hama-hama, and fly the first kite to find electricity. All of us are intrinsically polymaths, meaning many opportunities. In other words, “Yes, I’m the world’s best-selling author of 500,000 books. I’ve talked to more people live. I’ve created more millionaires,” but I’ve also own one of the fastest-growing alternative device energy companies that pop up windows called Natural Power Concepts and other companies. They are extraordinarily doing wonderful stuff because the question isn’t how little you can do and get away with. The questions are, how do you become financially free independent, so you can express who you are by having your self-awareness, self-expression, and realization of yourself.

You’re speaking my language. We are a real estate show and I love how you brought that financial piece in there because many people think that it’s noble not to focus on money. I love the word that you used noble and I love that we talked about the ability to expand. It does have a lot to do with our financial bearing. Can we take care of ourselves and do we have the money to give to the causes, whether it’s causes or the companies that we want to build that can then reach and benefit the planet in many ways. Many people think money is a bad thing. It’s not a bad thing. It’s simply a tool. As we ask, sometimes we feel a little bit like, “Should I be asking for this? It’s a financial base thing. It’s a goal to help me to grow in this particular way. Maybe people will judge me.”

The first thing is to understand within yourself that your financial security is a huge part of the amazing things you can do in the world. You want to reach a billion people and maybe some of you want to expand your family. Pay for college for your kids. That’s your big deal or your big expansion. You still can’t do any of that unless you’re taken care of and have the financial access to support all those things. Wouldn’t you say?

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking

The Magic of Asking: Asking gives illumination, insight, answers, or solutions. It gives new protocols, so your life can become what it’s supposed to be.


First of all, you and I are talking the same language. Let me say that first of all, from a spiritual point of view, ask yourself, ask God. God created the universe and we now know that there are 40,000 other planets in our sources. We’ve discovered that in the last few years in the Hubble that are like ours. We’re probably not the only intelligence in the universe, but we’re the highest intelligence on this planet.

Therefore, if you’re of high intelligence, one of the things you’ve got to do is earn more, save more, invest more than you could ever do. I was bankrupt in 1974, which I now think is my best work experience. I lost $2 million in one day. I went bankrupt after living in New York. I had to go to the world’s biggest library, the New York Library, and check out a book on how to go bankrupt by yourself because if you ask the wrong question, you go the wrong way.

I said, “How do I go bankrupt?” It got me out of what I shouldn’t be doing into the speaking. Once I was speaking, I said, “You’re supposed to earn it, save it, and invest it. Don’t buy two cars but buy one home. If you buy one car and two homes, the second home is an investment income home.” Let’s do my own story because it was a real estate company. I’m back in Long Island, New York. I have a mastermind group, which everyone has got to have. Two people come together and it’s the power of eleven. We had this little family, who’s still my best friend years later. They are buying and fixing up real estate and they say, “We got a house to sell to you for $2,000.” I remember I had no credit. I went bankrupt and no credit for seven years.

I was like, “Here’s a check for $2,000.” I bought a $14,000 house. This was in East Islip, Long Island, New York. The only mistake is I called Steven in Bel-Air. They are still in real estate and have done exceedingly well around the world. Three years later, I sold it for $58,000. I thought I was again the smartest guy in New York. The mistake we made was one, we should have bought all of East Islip and fixed it up, but at that time, I had not written a book that I’ve now written that I’ve finished called How to Think Bigger Than You Ever Thought You Could Think. Little thinking doesn’t pay off. Big thinking pays off.

The second thing I did was a book called Stand Up, Speak Out, and Win. I sold 20,000 copies from platform and I made $200,000. It’s $10 a book. I was selling in little itty bitty audiences. It’s not available anymore, but that’s it. The little audience is 6 people, 12 people, and 50 people. I said, “This isn’t a New York Times Bestseller or National Bestseller, but it is my bestseller, and I want to sign it for you, your spouse, your kids, and even dogs outside of your car,” and they all laughed. The first time I told them that is 37 people were standing in line and I made $370. I thought, “This is a good business.”

The second mistake I made is like the first. We should have bought all of East Islip. I’m holding up a mirror, so you look at my story and find your story of all the parables. The first thing is look for the parable. It’s the story within a story. There’s a literal story. The literal story is Mark went bankrupt and decided to become rich. The figurative story is you should have bought more of East Islip.

I write 5 to 7 books at a time, and I’ve got 318 books. Most of them are bestsellers. I have done more New York Times Bestsellers than anyone alive before the Guinness Book of Records. I’ve sold more books that are titled and more number ones. We’re number one in a lot of countries. The point I’m making is I could have started that earlier if I had thought differently. I’m holding up on a mirror. It’s the New Year, a new you or a renewed you if you’re watching in May or September, December, a year, two years, or five years.

How big can you think? You go inside your deeper innermost and what we’re saying is ask. Ask yourself, ask others, ask God. “God, what’s your destiny for me and how big is it? How miraculous is it? How empowered is it? How much favor? Can I be younger to buy however many points of income-producing real estate in new, innovative, exciting ways that may or may not include bank financing?”

I didn’t have any bank financing. Steve financed it out of the $14,000 I gave. In 2008, I financed the other $12,000. I bought the house for $7,000. It was a shack. We had to put in new heating and new walls and everything, but it still works. The only thing is that you’ve got to make sure that you’re doing enough and maybe I’ve overstated that or gone too long. Did that wrap for you?

Big thinking pays off.

Absolutely. First of all, I love when people speak inspired, so thank you for that.

I got to do one more subpoint. Do I believe you’ve got to read books? Yes, you ought to read at least 1 to 3 hours a day, self-hope action books. I do write fiction books and I love them. The fact of the matter is you need to have the basis. The foundation is got to be deep, so you know simple stuff. You check the Law of 72 because the first question is when I have 387 employees and demand a $100 million company in Newport Beach. The first question I ask all these MBAs that came in immediately is, “What’s the Law of 72?” If they didn’t know it, next. How could you go through your school and not know the Law of 72? These are some basic laws I teach.

Mark, I love that you said there are a million ways to make $1 million. I say that at least once a month on this show. There are a million ways to make $1 million in real estate. You have to find the one that’s perfect for you.

There’s a niche for everybody. We had a meeting with a guy who owns 10,000 units in town and he did it in his way, but everyone can do it in their own way. There’s a lot of ways to do it and there’s a lot in the world that needs it. When I was back in graduate school, the smartest guy, as far as I know, was my teacher, Dr. Buckminster Fuller. His teacher was Albert Einstein, but Bucky had us write down our goals. Now remember, I’m a 21-year-old and a 71-year-old is telling us to make the world work. One of my ten macro goals let’s be totally considerate environmentally in every other way. Let’s get it done.

We’re 1 billion people out of 8 billion people alive who don’t have a house, so let’s get that program going. Everybody reading or somebody out there is going to go, “I heard what Mark said. I can go figure out how to do it in Africa, India, China, Latin America or in America.” We were helping out people in the Indian tribes right here at the four corners area of Arizona. A lot of them don’t have houses and you go, “This is 2022. What are you telling me?” Not only do they not have houses, but they also don’t have electricity. They got the wind farms up there. I’m Danish and we said, “Something doesn’t smell right in Denmark.”

That’s such important work. It’s another one of those things where you’re doing something that’s beneficial for you. You’re also doing something that’s beneficial for a community or for people. There are so many ways to do good in the world, and we still expand for it in many different ways.

I wrote a whole book called The Miracle of Tithing, in which businessmen say, “What is a miracle kissing?” I said, “You haven’t been kissed enough lately.” I said, “You’re going to tithe your thinking.” That’s the most important and very few people do it, then you tithe your time. We tithe every book I’ve ever done. That’s why I sell more books than anybody, then you tithe your treasure, your money and you’re thankful in advance that you’re going to tithe it up. It’s bonus points. The point is, I’ll open up the windows of heaven and I’ll open up my sky vault and before you know it, you’ve got such a ritual, or you won’t be able to receive it. That’s why so many people watch my YouTube videos in Africa. They go, “I didn’t know that.”

I didn’t know it either. When I was coming through, I went bankrupt because I wasn’t thinking well. I teach people to think right, talk right, act right, and live right to go get the roads up because you and I are here to have an impact. When the game is over, you look back over your life, “I wasted it.” If I’m being honest, I said, “I could have bought East Islip for nothing.” All those houses went from $14,000 to now $500,000 houses.

I released my TEDx Talk. It’s called, Who is the Boss of You? It’s about living a life of choice. The biggest thing about living a life of choice is what we get to do with that choice. If we make choices that include other people, whether it’s contribution, travel, being active in your community, whatever it is. That contribution and connection with other people is a thing that brings us to happiness. If anybody wants to watch the TEDx, it’s at BlissfulInvestor.com/TEDx.

I love what you’re talking about with this whole piece of what we can do or what contribution tithing means. I do talk about it. If you don’t have money, there are many other ways to tithe through your thoughts, your actions, holding a door for somebody, helping somebody to their car if they can’t walk, or working in a soup kitchen. There are all different kinds of things and there are many different levels of tithing that starts up in your mind.

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking

The Magic of Asking: One of the things you’ve got to do is earn more, save more, and invest more than you could ever do.


When you wake up in the morning, you’d say, “You’re either a giver or a taker.” If you’re a taker and think you can take it all, here’s the question I ask. “Hold on to it. Don’t ever let it go. If you can’t do it, you got to give a breath before you can take the next breath.” One time, Bob Allen and I were at Maui Writers Conference. We’re on the beach and the beautiful Pacific. It’s 6:00 and we’re talking at 9:00. Bob says, “Come on, Mark. You wrote the book on tithing. Explain to me how it works.” He’s a Mormon and a good one and a Bishop and all that good stuff. I am not a Mormon, but I should respect every religion. The point is, we’re walking and he said, “You got a metaphor for tithing,” and it came to me spontaneously.

I said, “We’re looking at the water. Water has three forms. Tithing has three forms. When it’s frozen is when you don’t give. You’re constipated, stifled, stopped, or shuffled. When you get a little ambient, then you have a little bit of flow. You give a little bit. You go to church and get 1% or you help out somebody once. You do a little, then you get a little. Once you heat it up, then you become like vapor.” Everybody has been in a closed bathroom when you took your shower and one drop of water will steam up a whole mirror. You can’t see, and you got to wipe up. That’s what tithing does. It takes that 10% that you give to the noble good charitable causes that are worthy and getting the results you believe in and expands it.

It’s not you and I that’s expanding. I’ve learned three levels of money by writing this book From Wishes to Riches. I learned from one of my close friends in New York. He got me out of poverty when I got bankrupt and upside down. He said, “There is the material form of money, but then you go to the psychic form of money where you think about it. The real goal is to get the spiritual form of money where you can create it almost instantly because think and grow rich is what Napoleon Hill said. He emerged to that. Andrew Carnegie emerged to that.” I’m telling you that Elon Musk, who’s my hero, who’s the richest man in the world, he’ll be one of the two first trillionaires with his partner, Kiyo, as far as I’m concerned.

The point is it’s explosive and extraordinary what somebody can do when they go to the higher levels of what money is because you’ve got to get out of you working for money. One of the ways that money works for you and you pick, how much do I need a month? Do I need $1,000 passive, massive cashflow coming from real estate? If I have a house that rents for $1,500 a month, then I pay HOA and all the stuff for $500, then I get $1,000. If I need $10,000, then I need ten single-families or I need ten units. Pretty simple and you go, “Is it that simple? Come on.” I’ve been in real estate in seven different states at the same time, so I understand you can do that, and it still works, but it doesn’t matter.

There are a few things that matter. You need to know what to ask for, take action and support. I want to talk about why it is hard for people to ask? What do you think is it that stops them?

The second chapter in the book, after we do the fable of McKayla, which everybody can get. We’re going to give it to you free if you want by going to AskTheBookClub.com. We’ll talk about it later. We say there are seven roadblocks to asking. First of, all of them hit us once in a while. Some of us have all seven hits then you get prepped to respond. It’s good that you read our book or listen to it on video or watch it on YouTube. Overcome your lack of self-worth fullness because self-worth will usually be first.

The second is fear, then doubt, then naivité because you don’t know what you don’t know. You don’t know you can buy real estate even if you don’t have any money. I didn’t have any money, but I did have the right friends. It’s like what we’re saying, your net worth comes from your network. One of my many market trends includes shapes. You’ve got pattern paralysis where you do the same thing and keep expecting something new. I cited if you keep doing the same thing and expect new results, then you’re crazy.

I don’t watch shows like yours and listen to people who have done it. Be careful because all of us have friends, neighbors, and relatives. My wife and I start every day with an hour of meditation. The story of Jesus is not a prophet in his own hometown. We were talking about our role. If she is 1 to 9, I’m 1 to 4 and you go, “That’s true.” It’s your own role in the dark spectrum, no matter how rich you get, no matter how wise you are and no matter how the world accolades you.” I’ve won some of the biggest words. Like I’m a ratio of Jury Award Winner who came from rags to riches and been exceedingly prosperous and generous and wants to be more so.

The point is it’s exciting to be alive and fulfill your destiny and your mission by overcoming the seven obstacles that all of us have. If you look at somebody else’s story, you go, “That’s what stifling me, stopped me, detouring me or warning me. I’m now empowered by Mark.” We also say, “Here’s the stop sign and here’s how to eliminate the stop sign.” We give you three ways to eliminate stop signs.

It’s exciting to be alive and fulfill your destiny or mission.

Can you give me a quick synopsis?

No. If I did that, you wouldn’t have to read the book.

It’s okay if you don’t want to give it, but I would love it if you gave us a little bit.

I’m teasing you and I will answer your question in the second. A book is the best screening value ever, whether it cost $20 or $10. I’m going to telling you the crazy thing that’s happened when we became number one. The book is $21 on the cover in America. Now, we’re selling number one on Vietnam and maybe in Australia and all kinds of England. The point is Amazon does the opposite. They brought the price down to $14. It might be the best $14 you ever invest because you’re not investing in me. I’ve already done it. You’re investing in yourself, so you know how to ask yourself because that’s the real trigger here. Our research shows that 75% of people are afraid to ask. You’re born an incredibly inquisitive kid and we’ve got grandkids or something.

We were in Hawaii in our company. It’s a natural park concept. We’re on the beach and all of a sudden, I get a call from our six-year-old. For Christmas, you got to give him a watch. He phone calls his parents and the grandparent’s house. He said, “Grappy, are you alone?” I’m looking around at the beach and I go, “I’m here with Grammy.” He calls her Mimi. I said, “Mimi and I are here.” He said, “Can I talk to you privately?” I said, “Yes.” He said, “Are you still writing great books like the ones I’ve read of yours?” He’s six years old. He’s amazing. He can do the Rubik’s cube in one minute the first time, he got it. God bless him.

He said, “Are you still writing those books?” I said, “Yes, sir.” He said, “Can I write the next book with you?” The first story we’re doing here is about our grandson. That was all of the spreads. You got to buy my book. He’s going to grow up and do wonderful things. The point is, little kids were told, “Gramps has got many questions. Can’t you shut up? You ask why, how, when, and all that,” and then you go to school and I say, “I’m going to tell you what it is about. You go into the military and they tell you. You go to business and they tell you. You go to the life and your spouse tells you. Only two people’s opinions matter, yours and God. That’s it.

You’ve got to ask yourself, “How do I overcome it?” Here’s what you and I are going to do now that everybody is out there to answer your questions. This is M and M. Mooneka and Mark are giving you 100% permission to ask bigger, better, stronger questions with metaphorical biceps and triceps. You can go vigorously, valiantly, courageously, and bravely into a future that is worthy of you. Would you agree with that?

Yes. I’m not going to say anything else. That was so good.

We’re here to empower people to enlarge them. There’s nowhere in any spiritual literature that you’re supposed to be small and unworthy. That’s what roadblocks are. They make you less than because the world was out of its way to work against you. Now, it’s going to sound very self-serving, but I don’t go to sleep without reading positive self-help books.

Sometimes I read my own books and I read other people. In my library, I’ve got 50,000 of other people’s books. I’ve touched more books. I haven’t read every one of them wall to wall, but I’ve read 6,000 biographies and autobiographies. I’m writing biographies for people and writing autobiographies because I’ve had an exciting life. I have climbed Machu Picchu, Whitney, Fuji, and Kilimanjaro. We’re here to do cool, great things.

I’ve hung a week with Richard Branson on the Necker Island and, “I’m a little person.” I have the library 3.0 because the first great library was created by Alexander The Great. He conquered the world, but I got the wisdom, the insight and understanding. Here it is an Alexandria. Where do you live?

San Jose, California.

If you go to New York, you want to go to Andrew Carnegie’s house. It’s 60,000 square feet and it’s 95th and 5th Avenue. It’s owned by the Smithsonian Institute. The first thing he says is, “No man or woman get rich without enriching all others. You were like, “You’re rich and you make me poor.” Hell no, I don’t make you anything. You make you. I don’t touch you. I’ve made more millionaires than anyone other than Napoleon Hill. I go by all the research. The second thing he says is, “Authors are the wealth of the nation.”

The only thing I’ve switched with Andy’s line, the Scotsman, is authors are the wealth of the world. I think everyone is the author of him or herself. If you’re going to author yourself, you better be reading somebody who’s authored themselves well. That’s why I’m saying, “Go ahead and start reading biographies and autobiographies and read all my self-help action books.” Some of the other superstars that you got to read, they will change your thinking and change your life because you’re here to make your life bolder, bigger, better, brighter, more exquisitely exciting, penalizing and we love.

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking

The Magic of Asking: It’s explosive and extraordinary what somebody can do when they go to the higher levels of what money is.


I want to say I have a book called Choose Bliss, ladies. Check that one out also.

In this book, this is the 20th Anniversary edition, I said, “Will you write the fourth to it?” I went through a painful, extremely expensive war. What I did is I never told Crystal who I married long ago now, but I wrote down 267 wants. What do I want? What are the characteristics, values, and virtues? When you’re sixteen years old, what do you say? “She’s got to be slim, beautiful, and eye candy.” It’s very superficial if you think about it.

“I want them super strong. I want Arnold,” or whatever you want. I wrote everything I wanted. “She’s got to like and love me. She’s got to demonstrate making her own money,” because I don’t want her marrying me for my wallet. “She’s got to be a great lover and wonderful. She’s got to be cooperative, have financial savvy and underspends below her needs. She is flexible.” We do yoga every day. She loves to dance, thinks abundance and wants to create superior memories. She’s a non-smoker, non-drinker or non-drug user, charitable, and has great etiquette.”

This is what you asked about want. Most people, “On Mondays, I want to go to work, come home, have a quick drink, go to sleep after I watch TV.” No, you want to be a dullard. What the hell would you want that for? You’re a meandering generality. All of us weren’t born in dug. We were born over in dug. You’re born of eighteen billion brains cells. You are here to use them. “I get up, have coffee, go to work, come home, drink, pee, bed. You want me to read an hour to three hours?” Not for me. You read for you.

Mark, I feel like we can talk forever. I’m going to have to have you back on this show because I want to keep talking, but I want to be respectful of your time. We’ll do it again. Does that sound good? Before we move into our three rapid-fire questions, share with us how people can get in touch with you. I know you’ve got some great gifts that you want to offer my audience.

I want everyone go AskTheBookClub.com and it’s free because Crystal, my beloved beautiful wife, which you’ll see and you’d go, “Why would she marry you?” It’s because she’s super smart. I had the goals. She had no choice. I didn’t show it to her until after we were married. Here’s the truth. I’ve got to quit goofing around here. Everybody wants a soulmate but what you really want is the higher level of that, where two lit candles come together. It’s four-fold to eigh-fold higher and that’s called a twin flame. We’re twin flames. We can mirror each other 100%, which you’ll see if you watch any of our videos on YouTube or Ask The Book Club.

I want you to go to the other one, if you’ve got a story in you and you qualify, we want to help you publish. It’s called MarkVictorHansenLibrary.com. Alexander the Great had the first one. Andrew Carnegie did 2,500 benefactors libraries in America. The media, the dumbasses and the school teacher says he’s a robber baron. He’s the biggest philanthropist ever. Now, we’re doing Library 3.0 because I want everybody in every form to have a book, audios, memorabilia, films, and all that stuff codified. I call it the road library because it’s a repository of the wealth and treasures of your mind, heart, soul, and a story of your beingness. If you go there and look through this stuff, you’d go, “I do have a story.”

I will say releasing a book is the most magical experience in the world. You’ve done 300 something. I’ve done three, but still, you impact many people each time that goes out there. You think, “It’s only my story. Like big deal.” No, your story matters because there’s someone that will read that story and it will completely change their paradigm. If it’s one, but usually, it’s many thousands of people. If you have a good publisher that gets it out there, that’s what makes the big difference.

For those that are reading and in business, it’s the best business card. It makes you the authority. Author is in the word authority. It’s the authorship of your story. People will read it and you’ll assign it to them. They’ll take your business card and put it in the cylindrical file. Nobody throws away books that are assigned to them. To the spouses and their kids, the best scientists now they’re stuck.

Mark, you also said something that I think is cute, but I do the same thing. You were like, “I read a lot of books. A lot of them are my own.” A lot of times, I’ll pick up Choose Bliss and read that and go, “That was good,” because I feel like I channeled so much of the book and so much of that wisdom happened when I was in the zone, but they don’t always live in the zone. When I read, it’s as if I’m hearing from somebody that gets me. I’m like, “That’s great.” Every once in a while, someone is like, “I need to read your book.” When you get them, I’m like, “I need to read it again too.” That’s the thing. Ladies, when you write, you capture something so deep inside you that now you have access to for the rest of your life. It’s incredible.

There’s nowhere in any spiritual literature that says you’re supposed to be small and unworthy.

Everyone has more than they think. What are we teaching in my book? You have a book in you. My seminar, you can go to MarkVictorHansenLibrary.com and all that. You don’t try to write one book at a time because then you’ll have writer’s block. Maybe three or four, you never have writer’s block and screen for things at the same time. We all have it in us. What we do is we’re teaching differently. We say, “We start with a title and then we start with a cover,” because everybody else finishes the book then tries to come up with a title. It’s wrong. Start with the title, then the cover.

When you look at our website, you’ll go, “Look at the cover that these guys are doing.” Forgive me for being a little bodacious, but I’ve come up with this cover before we did the book. I teach everyone all that stuff because everybody is a brand and you need to make your brand. Be a brand that commands.

We’re going to talk more, Mark, just so you know. Also, ladies, if you want to go and get the book, go to AskTheBookClub.com. They’re going to be doing a webinar about the book and there’s all good stuff there. Go check that out. Mark, are you ready for our three rapid-fire questions?

I’m ready.

Tell us one super tip getting started asking and receiving in your life.

Start asking yourself all day long, “What do really I want?” Write it down. We’re going to have an Ask Journal, but we’ll have you do that every day because you’re going to ask yourself like, you got bigger and better and stronger. You’ll have new apps and each app will open up different stuff.

What is one way in being successful in continuing to ask and receive in your life?

Be crystal clear about what do you want. I wanted to be a speaker who talked. I want to care about things that would make a life transformative and different. If you can, write down that as a purpose statement. For Chicken Soup, I changed the whole world one word at a time. We only did stories that were seven things. We said personal was goosebumps, chilly bumps and the second one, instantaneous behavioral change. All that stuff had to be written because once it’s codified, it’s a commandment from you to you. Metaphorically, it’s marble and it’s solid.

Mark, what would you say is one daily practice that you do that contributes to your personal success?

I make all my own decisions and think for myself. It’s easy to get swayed by other people. Somebody offered me a bunch of stock for nothing in a company called Facebook. I asked the guy who created the internet and they said, “They will never make it.” I’m never doing that again. That was a dumb idea. It’s big and bold decisions. I’m willing to live with my decisions. You’ve heard me say my failures and stuff. Nobody is 100% successful. You see a lot of financial values show up and say, “I only know how to make money. I never lose money.” Warren Buffett says, “The first rule is make money and never lose money.” He got money out of a few things. Overall, you’re going to make more money than you’ll lose.

Mark, this conversation has been amazing. Thank you so much for bringing in our New Year with your wisdom.

Thank you. My pleasure.

Ladies, stay tuned for EXTRA because we’ve got more. Mark is going to be talking to us about his technique for asking our higher selves, the universe, God, or whatever you want to call it, how to find out what your destiny is. What are you supposed to be doing or if you’ve got a business problem and how to get the answer to that business problem? Stay tuned for EXTRA for that. If you are already subscribed. If you’re not subscribed but would like to be, please go to RealEstateInvestingForWomenEXTRA.com. You get seven days for free, so check it out. If you love it, you get to stay in. If not, at least you’ve got some great new content.

For those of you that are leaving us, thank you so much for joining Mark and me for this portion of the show. Wasn’t it a great way to start the New Year? I had so much fun and I appreciate you. I look forward to seeing you next time. Until then, remember, goals without action are dreams, so get out there, take action and create the life your heart deeply desires.


Important Links


About Mark Victor Hansen

REW 92 | The Magic of Asking

Mark Victor Hansen is an American inspirational and motivational speaker, trainer and author. He is best known as the founder and co-creator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul book series.





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